Agent J

Ah, dear old MacBook, my trusty old friend, how you continue to prove yourself useful to me even when you may harbor feelings of replacement and resentment. Well, thanks to you, I am once again able to access my amazing WordPress community and re-contribute to the blogging world.

I had originally planned to start up again with a book club post, followed by a list of other topics that have been rattling inside my brain, but I have a situation at hand that I would like to discuss.


As I sit here typing away, J is out gallivanting like a rogue CIA agent, sent on a mission that he believes only he can accomplish. This past week, a rumor spread throughout the show he is working that it was getting flipped into a Union gig. Basically, this means that all the workers there would get grandfathered into an organization that fights for better pay, easier working conditions, and health benefits. However, this translates to the production company having to dole out more money in order to meet the new criteria. Needless to say, they declined. Thus, the entire crew, J included, have gone on strike. Now, initially, I supported this movement wholeheartedly; all of the men and women running around in the desert all day deserve the increases and benefits, but my whole opinion has changed as of today.

J just told me about some of the activities that the strikers are initiating which could be considered “illegal”. To make matters worse, he thinks that they are absolutely justified because they are fighting for a good cause. While I do understand that principle, I think that there needs to be a line drawn as to what is acceptable when handling this whole situation. I hold strongly to the notion that the ends should never justify the means. I am struggling with the idea that the man that I love, the one that I thought complimented me so perfectly, could have opinions as drastically opposite to my own. Not only does he support the dangerous antics, but he is volunteering himself when others won’t step up.

I tried to communicate to him how worried I am that he may be getting in too deep, but he thinks I am being silly. My friends, I do need your help. Oftentimes I have difficulty separating healthy emotions and concerns from unhealthy ones (this is the topic of the next mini series that I want to tackle FYI), so I need opinions and advice. Do you think that perhaps I am truly over reacting? Maybe, this is stemming from my need to control the people and situations around me. Or am I really right to be concerned? More than that, though, should I be worried about what this means for my relationship with J?

I would love your feedback! I know that there are many of you out there who can offer me great wisdom and insight. Any input would be appreciated.

Love Always,

P.S. Chapter 4 discussion is happening tonight! Followed by the first post of my new mini series: Reality or Codependency? Also expect another Lesson from Kenya, and hopefully an update on this whole Agent J situation by the end of this weekend.


4 thoughts on “Agent J

  1. Ok my friend Freedom, here is my personal opinion, so please take it for what it is: J is a grown man who knows right from wrong. You have a right to be concerned because his actions could affect you and your relationship. However, as I stated, J is a grown man. He is free to make his own choices. It is not your job to try and keep him from making bad ones. You have expressed your concern and now the ball is in his court. His action are his responsibility and he will be subject to the consequences of them…good or bad.

    Your job is to communicate your concerns and set the consequences for him as it will relate to you and your relationship if he makes the bad choices. Very hard to do. Then, you stay on your side of the street and make sure you are taking care of yourself so that you stay emotionally and physically healthy. You keep doing what you need to do. When you are stressed out about the situation, you tell yourself, “He’s a grown man and the consequences are his” and you detach and refocus on your own issues and life.

    I hope that made some sense. Trust me, I know how terribly hard that is to do but it is doable! Big hugs!


    • You are so right! I have to trust that he is a man of integrity and is able to make good and wise decisions. You are also correct in saying that this can be sooo hard to do. I want to be able to control and keep him safe, but it is not my place. I am responsible only for myself. Thank you, thank you, thank you. I needed to hear that!

      Liked by 1 person

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